Tag Archives: metaphysics

and they wondered if she was special too

Ever since conception I seen this silver light around my daughter. If you have followed my blog you already know this is partially how I discovered I was pregnant. There were times in my pregnancy that let my fear take ahold of me and I would place my hand on my stomach and see her light and know she was alright. It gave me faith when I needed it most. After she was born I continued to see this light. Its always around her.

In the beginning I thought this was a light of creation. A light that maybe babies have and their connection with mother. But after seeing this light around her constantly I realized a couple months ago it was her.
My mom wonders allot if my daughter is gifted. She has wondered this since finding out I was pregnant. Inside I have known for a while that she is. I don’t know how she is gifted but in my heart I know it for a fact. I hope that I will be able to help her when she discovers she is different. Perhaps my gifts are meant to help her.

When I was little I knew I was different for as long as I can remember.  It was a very matter of fact.  I remember as early as six talking to my mom about how I had to help people so I could be an angel.  I was obsessed with being an angel.  My mom thought it was abnormal but just blew it off as back in the 80’s talk like this was no common.  She realized as I got older that something was incredibly different and then mapped it all the way back to even her pregnancy with me being different.

When I was young I relied on mom 110%.  I felt she was the ONLY one that could ever understand me and believe me.  She was the only person I decided to open up to until I was 29.  She became more then a mother or a best friend she become part of me.  And I feel I am tied to her at a spiritual level.

I don’t know the path for my daughter but I do know that I will also be there to help her.  I have no idea why my family is the way we are but these different gifts have been passed down through generation.  To our knowledge mine is currently the most in depth one.  But I feel maybe my daughters will be stronger yet.

Silver aura’s are exceptionally gifted.  Only time will tell I suppose but my little silver flower continues to blossom with everyday.images


Grandpa’s presence

Over a year ago I was in another relationship with someone who had allot of spirit attached to them. There are a variety of reasons why some people have more spirit attached to them while other have a few. This particular individual had spirit attached to him because of his roots, because of unfinished business and because he had a calling that he had not risen to. Some people want to know everything around them but there comes a point of time where in a relationship with someone who sees, such as myself that this can lead to complications.

During the time I was with my ex I seen his grandpa, his grandpa’s brother, his grandma, and several natives behind him. The first one to step forward was his grandfather. A really nice man. He appeared to my left facing the direction of east. I didn’t know the significance at the time but the more visitors I had, the more I learned that when I am with someone their spirits always appear to me in the direction to the east when conveying as message. The Eagle is the direction of the east and the eagle is the animal I feel closest to. They always appear in my life.
Back to his grandfather…. He stood crouched down a bit and had dark skin. He had a close association to my ex but he felt comfortable to talk to woman so he came to me. After I communicated this to my ex, I learned that his grandfather had to walk with a cane which is why he was crouched and when I asked about his skin he said he was not light-colored like my ex. He had the darker tone skin. His grandfather continued coming to me. He was worried about his wife who was still alive and also was concerned over some family politics. We were together for maybe 6 months and during that whole time his grandfather continued coming forward. I would communicate these messages to my ex who would then call his grandma and communicate them to her. She missed him dearly. I really liked his grandfather. It’s not that he was a very personable man, he was just respectable. It’s kind of like a man of few words sort of thing. You always respect those folks because they choose their words so carefully. When I would talk to my ex, his grandfather would sometimes step forward if there was something to be added.

It’s always interesting how close our family is even after they pass. When given the opportunity I always remind people that their loved ones are still here, still a soul but just that they have moved on past life as we know it.


a small white light

It was a “normal” evening like any other. I found myself on the couch with the computer on the cushion facing me. What a long work day. I leaned back to stretch and as I positioned myself again I seen there tiny ball of light. It was white and had a glow around it. So small. It was something spirit related but as I began to look into it more it disappeared as it flew into my stomach. Now I have seen allot and I mean ALLOT of strange things but this really made me stop in my tracks. There was something about this little ball of light. It seemed familiar. And I felt I had a connection with it but I had no idea how or why. it was the most beautiful ball of light I had ever seen. The fact that it disappeared into my stomach was odd to me. This doesn’t happen with spirit (in my experience).
Eventually I let it go but as the weeks went by I found myself again thinking about this tiny ball of light.
Last week I went grocery shopping. Stocking up on fresh cooking supplies and some favorites. I came home famished and began helping myself to pickles, sour cream and cold cut ham. If you have been following my blog, then you may see this as odd as I have been a vegan for some time.
Earlier this week my great grandma (my grandma’s mom)graced me with her presence again. But it was strange. She was pacing almost around the house all day. She was trying to tell me that she was watching over me and was here for me. I began to feel crowded as I knew my grandma was not the only spirit in the house as well. I could feel loved ones connected to my fiance. I feel confused but then again, I knew something was going on.
Ever since that ball of light I wondered if there was a chance that the spirit – the small ball of light was connected to me. And by connected to me, I mean literally. I thought maybe, I was pregnant.
After seeing grandma pacing. I knew I needed to take a test.
I found myself under the bright bathroom lights, peeing on a stick.
I put the stick on the bathroom lid behind me and considered myself crazy. “I’m not going to look at it, I’m not pregnant” I kept telling myself. But as I turned I took a big gulp as I watched one line appear strong and as the water moved further, there it was a second line. “What!” I held it closer to my eyes double checking – one line means not pregnant, two lines means pregnant…. Now I knew my grandma was here with me. Grandma comes when she feels she needs to be there for me.
which brings me to today. Somewhere between 4-6 weeks along.
What did this ball of light mean? What was it exactly? Was this another form of spirit trying to communicate with me to tell me I was pregnant? Did I see this light when the egg was implanting in my uterus? This is kind of a big deal because I felt like I had a bond somehow with this light. Is it possible I communicated with my unborn child? I have tons of questions. Amoungst all the new feelings coming over me about being mom I wonder how our relationship will be different because of my gift. Will I be able to communicate with him differently? Will he be like me? Will he have a gift?
I would give nearly anything in this world for this child to be born healthy. I can’t even describe the feeling but in my heart I already feel connected to it and I want to protect it with everything I have. Scared, excited, anxious… I feel it all.
I had dreams weeks ago of a little boy. Everything was white. I walked into a room and seen this toddler. He layed on the floor on his stomach. With his elbows holding up his head as he kicked his backlegs back and fourth while watching tv. As I entered the room he felt my presence. Not with his ears. He turned around and had this huge smile on his face. His smile was cheek to cheek and as I looked at him him I realized, he had my smile. And I smiled back. He had big eyes and although I seen myself in him, I also could see traits of someone else. He was beautiful. I woke up panicked and pulled on my fiances arm to wake him and tell him what I saw. As much as this may seem like a happy dream, to wake up and no longer see that face that you felt so connected to – felt like a punishment. It’s not easy to describe. This is not the first time I had seen this little boy either. When I first started speaking to my fiance I had a dream of delivering a baby in the hospital.

what does this all mean? How close to our future is our present? Do we have the ability to connect even with unborn children? My life is forever changed and only the future will hold the answers to all these questions.


A mothers wish

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Its been a while since I wrote. I have been spending allot of time in nature and working on my life relationships. Life has been good to me. I feel I can breathe and embrace each day as they have been coming.

The other day I was at the salon getting my hair done. While talking to my colorist I felt a “mother” presence with me. She was the salon owners mother and she comes forward everytime I am there. I tired to continue carrying on my normal conversation but she was a little distracting. At one point a picture on the all dropped off and fell over. No one was near it and my colorist jumped and became very scared. I asked her to stay calm and insured her that it was just the owners mother making herself known and showing her persistence to be heard. My shampoo girl (who knows of my gift) came over and tried to convince me to speak to the owner regarding her mother. I was very hesitant as the owner had allot of issues. Most dominating were her anger issues. I try not to get too close when people have such large issues both for protection of myself and inability to understand the lack of wanting to change. It’s very confusing for me so most times I try to separate myself from the situation. As the shampoo girl was talking the mother really became impatient. It seemed she just really wanted me to let her daughter know that she is not gone and she is always by her side. I couldn’t understand why the persistence in this message so I told the shampoo girl and she said there was a psychic at the shop yesterday and the owner waited and waited. All she wanted was for her mother to come though and she never did. She said the owner cried as she had gone to many physics always searching to hear from her mother. Hearing this, I felt I had no choice. I could clearly understand why it was important. With about 100 foils on my head in a robe I went to the back of the salon and found myself in the owners office. I explained the message from her mother and some of things that needed to be shared. She cried and said all she ever wanted was to hear from her mother and couldn’t understand why she never came through. I explained to her that I don’t have all the answers but they do come through to certain people and during certain times when they feel best.

One of the lessons I learned from this was, you can’t always go looking for something. It’s not harmonious and its sometimes a waste of time because when things are ready to happen, they will happen. Later on in the afternoon the mother came through to me after I had left the salon. Her niece had a question for her and she had come through and given me the answer to deliver for her.


A new moon opens a new path

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Yesterday was a new moon day. New moon days are always good days for me. Even if they don’t feel that way at the moment, there is always something life changing about them for me. Yesterday – last night proved to be no different.

I had another dream last night of a run-away. This one was different though. She was still alive. I was trying to help guide her. I woke up confused and went about my morning not thinking much of it.

I’m a part of a private community online that helps assist in animal communications. This page is run by a close friend of mine. Whether a pet is missing and someone needs help from beyond in locating them or trying to understand some behavioral issues from a pet. This community helps to assist in this process. There are tons of wonderful stories thus as a result. This page has been a great inspiration!

When I logged on this morning it really connected the dots for me. I have had a number of spirits who are children come to me and walk me through their life and death. I never really knew what to do with the information. How I can help both them and their loved ones so I ask for more guidance. A light bulb came on this morning as I realized a way of helping others by bridging the gap between the physical plane and spirit. I am going to create a private Facebook page that will be run by myself and other psychics, mediums and empaths to help people with their missing children. When I say a “private page” no one will be allowed to view the page and take part in it unless they are part of team running it or have a missing child. It will be spread by word of mouth.

If there is any psychics, mediums and empaths that is willing to join me in these efforts, please reach out to me.

Many blessings ~


When paths cross

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I stopped digging for answers. Or should I say solutions. I kept wondering what more can I do to help? I wanted to help as many people as possible and eventually, I felt overwhelmed by my own ambition. I finally decided that this was the time when you let people come to you. Since then, they have been coming out of the woodwork.

On Saturday morning I woke up very early. A spirit from a family member who passed on came to me through a dream and gave me some directions in regards to the healing of his passing. It was very moving. I tossed and turned until 4:30 am when I decided to stop fighting it. By 5:20 I was heading out for a morning walk to clear my mind and start the day. It was still dark but I like it that way. Everything is quite and you can breathe in the sounds of the early morning. About 15 minutes into my walk I noticed a security officer by the park (they had an event going though the weekend). I smiled and chirped “Good morning!” “Good morning” she replied as she began to walk toward me. I put my mp3 player in my pocket as I knew she needed to talk. She had allot on her mind. Such a nice person. This is why I love meeting people. To feel the light that people have around them is amazing. If only everyone’s thoughts were through their heart and true spirit, there would be more beauty radiating from their throat chakra and aura.

We spoke for a good hour or so. Although the conversation was going great as she kept saying how happy she was to meet someone like me I was getting impatient a bit on spirits part. Because no-one was coming through so I felt confused. Someone usually comes through. I finally said (in my inner voice) “what’s the connection, where is this going?” She really liked to talk. And there it was – in her next sentence she mentioned being a sibling of 14. And she was umber 10. “Wow, wait – 14?” I asked. And then she proceeded, “well yes, but we actually just lost our first one.” “Ah ha.” I said. “Was it a male?” “yes” she said. “Older?” “yes” she said. Issues with the heart but of natural causes?” “yes” she said. She stopped and looked at me. I apologized as I normally do. Hearing the truth from a strangers mouth is not easy so I always apologize as I never want to be abrasive.

Her brother was a good man. She was still suffering. She missed him and felt disconnected from him as she was blinded by some of the decisions he made in his lifetime. I asked her if there was somewhere he used to go that was special to him like a place or church. She mentioned this place and said he used to bring flowers there to connect with God. I asked her to do it for him on his behalf. Since he was no longer on the physical plane, she should do this act of service for him and while doing it – connect with him inside, letting him know. She will then feel his presence and she will feel assured knowing he still alive in spirit. She cried. She said when I started asking the questions she felt a warmth come over her and she wasn’t sure what it was. I told her it was him. That the messages I received were from him. She said I was right and that she needed to do that for him. We hugged and I went on my way.

I know it may sound strange but I consider this like on call volunteer work. It feels right. Until I believe differently, I’ll keep walking…


“Thou shalt not kill”

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what really does this mean? When I ask that question what I’m really wondering is if this is just applied to humans or animals as well? Many vegetarians may agree that its applied to both. I’d like to better understand spirituality and vegetarianism.

In December 2012 my life was going through a major change. A change that I couldn’t even begin to be able to comprehend. My world felt like it was flipped upside down. For years and years I had been trying to live with ear muffs on. Denying the things I felt. At my lowest moments I was praying every night asking for someone to make the things I saw and felt stop (in terms of spirit). They never did stop but I did find somewhat of a way of coping. It was called lying. I would lie to myself everyday pretending that I didn’t “feel”, “see” or “know.”

All that changed when December 2012 rolled in. The volume increased fiercely. I could no longer deny anything. I had spirits coming to me daily. I had strong empath skills developing and my psychic skills were amplified. I saw spirit from everything, plants, animals, people. Everything began to move with this divine harmony in life. It was humbling to see this.

I revisit that month in my mind often because these changes I was going through effected so many areas of my life that I find it fascinating.
I no longer wanted to eat meat. I was eating meat every other day or more before this. Infact, I made a conscious point of doing it as I had an iron issue.
Giving it up was “different.” The first week or so I was disgusted by it. This came out of nowhere but as time progressed I just had this feeling of simply “not wanting it.” I figured, “I’ll just eat it whenever I feel like it again.” Going on 9 months here, I still haven’t felt like eating it. It puzzles me how my body could just have no urge for something it was trained to like and digest in these 29 years.

What did it all mean? Is there a connection between spiritual advancement and vegetarianism?

For a full month – all of January 2013 I ate salads galore. I felt like I couldn’t get enough vegetables in. It almost felt like I was replenishing after a fast or something. I felt good as I still had energy and my stomach issues disappeared. Above all, my gifts continued to evolve. Today, its a night and day difference in comparison from where I was in December. It doesn’t feel as a result of a change of diet. Does this make sense? It’s like when you are getting ready to move into a nicer home and you go though all your things to donate the items you no longer need. This is my relationship to meat. It’s simply just not needed anymore.

I wonder if this “meat” change and the spiritual change I was going through are connected? I have read a few articles online that some folks say “giving up meat” is part of a spiritual process of evolving. I found this very interesting and couldn’t help but wonder if this could have been applied to myself.